February 9th 2010 (1 year, 4 days)

My words for today are life and death.

I woke up early this morning, so I could go for a longer walk to begin my day.

Around the block, across the street and in to the cemetery.

It was a cool morning, the sun hidden behind thick grey clouds. But it was peaceful and as I walked towards the grass, away from the noise of the cars, my soul was still and quiet.

I slowly made my way around the cemetery. At the time I didn’t notice, but in hindsight I recognised that there was no church there.
And yet God was so present.
And the memories of people of old who were believers, struck me and comforted me.

Row upon row. Flowers. Epitaphs. Ways to remember. To honour.

Lest we forget.

January 9th 2010 (1 year)

I think it’s a shame my life isn't more like a movie.

You know, predictable storyline, but a happy ending.

The main character always gets hurt; the guy she’s in love with leaves, she gets fired, she’s betrayed by her best friend – real life stuff, whatever.
She gets hurt.

But some how, it always works out.

There was a greater reason for him leaving, because he knew it would be best for her, because he loves her and actually he still wants to be with her forever so they get back together.
Or her boss turns out to be a jerk anyway so he gets fired, and she gets her job back – better pay, better position, better in the end.
Or the friend realises the error of her ways (we all suck sometimes!), but she reaps what she sows and has to deal with the consequences of her mistake, but there’s the apology and their friendship is salvaged and they live happily ever after.

(Honestly? I don't really wish my life were like a movie. Or, if I did then, at least I don't now!
I can be so dramatic sometimes... Now it actually annoys me that movies are always so predictable. I really don't like that. I'm glad I have no clue what my life is gonna turn out like. At least that way I'm more inclined to let God take a hold and lead me wherever!)

Jan 4th 2010: (1 year)

Waiting is so difficult when you don't know what for...